My good test results from Friday are finally beginning to sink in, and it’s like a weight being slowly lifted off my shoulders. It typically takes 3-5 days to get results from a CT scan. And by that time, the pressure of waiting has built up so much that it’s a giant release when I finally hear from the doctor. But this time I talked with the radiologist and got the good news before I even left his office. While it was certainly welcome news, I didn’t feel the huge sense of relief that comes with the wait (Note: this is not a complaint!).

So it’s taken a few days to decompress, and even to realize how stressed I was by the knowledge of the upcoming test. My energy and ambition levels have begun to rise—I cleaned up the house, did laundry, and painted the living room (with J.P.’s help) this weekend. I should recognize the patterns after 3+ years on this roller coaster—when I’m in the midst of all the stress, I have no energy to do anything. Poor J.P. ends up doing almost everything around the house, and he has to put up with me on top of it all. But despite all this, he never complains. I don’t know how he does it.

Although it wasn’t exceptionally warm today, the birds were singing and we could feel spring approaching. I’m always grateful to get good test results, but this time it seems especially appropriate to have a new lease on life just as the plants and trees will be coming to life in the warm days ahead.


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